40. Creating a dopamine menu

Because, no, 30 episodes of Love Island isn't necessarily ideal for longevity.

Well, hi! Talking Since Tuesday… on Wednesday, you ask?!

(Yes, because I quite simply did not get to it Monday, thank you very much — but look at me writing and sending it anyways!)

Guys, I’ve decided I really do have summer-induced seasonal depression. And maybe not seasonal depression necessarily, but definitely seasonal FUNK.

I’m not quite sure what it is — the 100 degree weather? The exorbitantly high electricity bill? The desire to be in a pool? The general mid-year overwhelm? — but it’s been hitting me lately.

So, as every good Enneagram 3 girlie does, I’ve been on a mission to overcome it *without* only spending my time scrolling, watching, and absorbing content.

(I wonder sometimes how my life would be if I just… chilled out, but I digress. I am who I am, ya know?!)

Enter: the concept of a dopamine menu.

I saw this idea floating around on TikTok a few months back, but it wasn’t until I heard this episode of Note to Self that I actually understood what it was. 

Essentially, a dopamine menu is a cutie little list (a menu, if you will) to refer to when you need DOPAMINE… but don’t want to scroll through your phone to get it. 

Lemme explain (and I failed Chemistry 102 in college, so let’s see how this goes).

Dopamine is a neurotransmitter often called the “feel-good chemical.” On an ideal evolutionary level, dopamine is meant to reward us and keep us motivated when we do pleasurable things that keep us alive. Since we’re hardwired to do things that ignite pleasure anyways, it’s obvious that we all LIKE the feeling of dopamine.

While dopamine is something that’s naturally stimulated by things like sunlight, movement, and the like, most of us don’t make those our primary sources of dopamine — at least, we certainly don’t rely on those as primary sources of dopamine like our ancestors did.

These days, we don’t have to.

Instead, most of us tend to rely on quick hits of dopamine through things like caffeine, long TikTok scrolls, binge-watching TV, shopping, slamming back a DoorDash order in 5.2 seconds, etc. All of those things are good for instantly clicking on that pleasure center in the brain, sure. BUT, at the same time, our brains — which were once so consumed by hunting, gathering, and starting fires to stay alive — can pretty quickly get addicted to things like TikTok, TV, shopping, and the like.

After all, those things feel good.

SO, all of that to say, looking for sources of dopamine that don’t have anything to do with doom-scrolling and binge-watching is a good way to encourage our brains to find dopamine in a healthier way, and less in an I-must-watch-30-episodes-of-Love-Island-to-feel-anything way.

So, what is a dopamine menu, you ask? (I answer.)

This is a lil’ menu bb of things — almost like a to-do list — that stimulate dopamine for YOU. The concept was actually developed to help those with ADHD (hi, LOL) stimulate dopamine and productivity. 

By building your own dopamine menu, you can have a list of things to fall back on when you know your brain needs a little lift, but not 30 episodes of Love Island, an Alani Nu, or 10 minutes of TikTok that’s going to turn into 55 minutes.

They can be quick “sides,” or they can be big shebang “main courses” — as follows:

The pieces of a dopamine menu

Appetizers: These are quick, easy activities (usually 5-10 minutes or less) that will give you a little happy boost.

Main courses: These are activities that will take you longer, but that you love doing.

Sides: These are going to be activities that you can pair with daily tasks to make them more enjoyable (and make them feel rewarding to your brain).

Desserts: These are fun, occasional activities that you love — but you shouldn’t do in excess.

My dopamine menu

Appetizers:

• A little snuggle with Holly 🐶

• Make myself a latte in my espresso machine

• Do the NYT Connections & Mini Crossword

• Wipe down my kitchen counters or bathroom counters (or fluff up my couch pillows and fold blankets)

• Light a new candle

• Send a friend a voice note

• Do my skincare routine

• Make a to-do list

• Cracking my back (...lol)

Main courses: 

• Go to a workout class 

• Long walk with Holly or with a friend

• ACTUALLY watch a movie or an episode of a TV show (no scrolling allowed)

• Read a book (ideally with a cute lil’ drinkie drinkie)

• Listen to a podcast I love 

• Cooking a really delicious, healthy meal with a really good playlist or podcast on

• Grocery shopping (...I love it)

• Pinterest, Pinterest, Pinterest! (This just never feels doomscroll-y to me — it feels light and inspirational)

• Organize something in my apartment

• Go on a little treat voyage (AKA, a new coffee shop or bakery)

• Getting a deep-tissue massage

Sides:

• Cleaning, folding laundry, or getting my nails done (bc that’s a TASK, k?!) with a long podcast episode on

• Set a timer for getting something done

• YouTube vlogs while I work through easy administrative stuff

• White noise while I read before bed

• Turning on the candle warmer in my office during a workday

• Working from a coffee shop (with a breakfast taco!)

• Episode of a comfort show while I do little day-to-day tasks (The Office, Breaking Bad, and old Grey’s are mine)

Desserts:

• Order dinner on DoorDash (or a small pepperoni pizza with 2 spicy garlic sauces from Papa John’s) and eat while I watch a movie

• TikTok (...I mean, duh)

• Reality TV :’)

• Martinis with my girlies

• Online shopping (or at least building a cart and clicking out of it, tbh) 

What a good idea, right?!

Now, it’s your turn 🥲

I just wrapped up Challenger by Adam Higginbotham, and haven’t quite stopped thinking about it since. If you’re even slightly into nonfiction (and okay with a dense book), I can’t recommend this one enough. It covers the 1986 Challenger explosion, but also delves deep into the history of NASA, its organizational faults, and so much more. It was poignant AND informative AND remarkably interesting. It would also probably be really good on audiobook.

Twisters: Guys it was a yes from me. A little cheesy, a little predictable, but also really entertaining *and* full of very gorgeous men. (Namely… Glen Powell?!) I’ve been petrified of tornadoes my entire life and this didn’t necessarily HELP — but it was saur good.